So early Monday morning I talked about the epiphany I had about how unfit I had physically become, and how much fat I was now carrying around my belly, and in the post I discussed the possibilities of exercising when continuing to stuff.
Hahahahahahahahahahaha!
It's ok to laugh at me as well.
I'm going to give a little run down of my day.
After the dog toy incident and the subsequent revelations from standing on the scale afterwards I gathered the little ones for breakfast of banana waffles then once they were at day care I treated myself to leftover tiramisu. Had another cup of coffee got ready for work, and off I went where i sat on my bum at work until i had a lunch of two large veggie soft tacos and a 20 oz Sprite, then back to work where I sat on my bum until I had a king size Reese's then sat on my bum until picked the kids up, and came home.
Dinner wasn't anything special - just standard spaghetti, and leftover tiramisu for dessert.
Cleaned house, cleaned children, played fetch, read bedtime story, took pictures for FF, then I snuck a whole chocolate cake to my room and devoured it.
Where was the exercise...? No where... And, I ended up stuffing myself on fatty things...
i feel slightly ashamed...
So here i am in bed, in too small pajama bottoms and a tee shirt that used to be big on me, body feeling tired and soft and well padded, belly resting on my lap and grumbling from a whole chocolate cake.
Oh well.
Can you imagine the calories I had:
1) Cup of coffee with cream and sugar.
2) Four waffles
one banana,
cup of strawberries,
butter,
syrup.
3) Plate of tiramisu.
4) Cup of coffee with cream and sugar.
5) 20 oz Sprite
two giant tortillas wrapped around
onions, bell peppers, jalapenos, spinach, squash, muenster, and spices.
6) King sized Reese's Peanut Butter cups.
7) Large Plate of spaghetti
8) Another plate of tiramisu.
9) Whole chocolate cake.
I'm so $&#*^% doomed...
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Monday, March 21, 2011
Consequences of Frequent Overindugence
So this morning I wake up at 6 a.m. as I normally do. I walk outside for my morning cigarette, and I see the dog sitting in the middle of the yard staring straight up. Thinking there is a bird or a squirrel that has caught her attention I ignore it for a few minutes until I noticed that she did not move a muscle or turn her gaze the slightest bit which she would have done where she focused on a small creature moving around so I go to the dog, and look straight up. Thirty feet in the air there is a dog-tow, a rope with a red rubber ball on it, dangling from the branches approximately thirty feet in the air.
The dog has had this tow for a few years now, and it is one of her favorites. How it ever got thirty feet up a tree is beyond me, but I did see the cat sitting on a lawn chair with a smug, "What now, B*%#^#@" look on his face.
I send the animals back into the house and take the kids wiffle ball to try and knock the toy down. If you're ever faced with a situation where you need to knock something from a tree do not use a wiffle ball. ultimately ineffective. After ten minutes of chucking a wiffle ball as hard as I could at the thing i didn't hit it once and was feeling short of breath and had a cramp. "Damn, i really have let myself get out of shape," i thought to myself looking down at the round mound of fat clinging to my unfed belly.
After I caught my breath I took a mesquite log and chucked that at the dog toy - missing completely I remember thinking "Dammit - I can't hit anything" But, then the log started coming down; it landed smack dab on top of the dog tow which made a bee-line to the earth, but now there is a mesquite log, thirty feet in an oak tree over the middle of the backyard where two small children, two dogs, one cat, and one particularly out of shape woman play.
Dragging the ladder out from the garage, around the house, and then to the middle of the back yard was also a lot of hard work. I felt weak, and really just wanted to sit down, but calling the fire department to retrieve a mesquite log from an oak tree sounded idiotic.
Climbing the ladder was harder than climbing stairs. I don't spend a lot of time on ladders, and was unsure of my balance so i was leaning towards the center of the ladder, belly and breasts kept hitting the steps.
Long story short I got the log out of the tree, put the ladder back and plopped down on the bench huffing and puffing. By the time i caught my breath my belly began to grumble for food. I looked down at it, and there it was - round, and loose, and resting on my thighs. I cannot believe I let this happen.
I mean I know i stuff often, but I used to be adamant about working out, and though I know I haven't in a long time when did I get this out of shape, and this plumpened - then I remembered buying size 16 jeans the last time I went to the store.
Was I just ignoring the fact that i was getting fat? Or was i aware and just not caring?
This morning I was wearing old yoga pants from back when I actually did yoga, and that was at least 40 to 60 pounds ago, and I was wearing a cami that I had gotten about 40 to 60 pounds ago as well. When I came back inside my oldest asked me if I was gonna have another baby!
I looked at myself in the mirror, and sure enough, in that outfit, belly and love handles pinched by too small pants, and belly bare under a too small cami, the several inches of fat clung to my middle, and I would look knocked up if it weren't for how malleable and soft I was.
The lessons learned. Wiffle balls aren't good for getting dog toys out of trees, might as well just go get the ladder the first time, being lazy and having no time for exercise makes a girl severely out of shape to the point of even tossing things in the air for ten minutes gives her a cramp, and overeating makes you fat.
Will i stop stuffing? Hell no. Will i start working out? I'm going to try to find the time to do so. I might have to work my way back up to riding bikes though. the truth is I don't mind the extra flesh my stuffing has brought on - I look at it as a sign of my pleasure, but there's no reason i should be this unfit.
If you love stuffing but don't want to end up like me, don't stuff too often, and avoid sweets, and exercise a lot more often than I do. It's really not that hard to stay fit and stuff - I did for years 'til the kids came, and i had not time anymore.
The dog has had this tow for a few years now, and it is one of her favorites. How it ever got thirty feet up a tree is beyond me, but I did see the cat sitting on a lawn chair with a smug, "What now, B*%#^#@" look on his face.
I send the animals back into the house and take the kids wiffle ball to try and knock the toy down. If you're ever faced with a situation where you need to knock something from a tree do not use a wiffle ball. ultimately ineffective. After ten minutes of chucking a wiffle ball as hard as I could at the thing i didn't hit it once and was feeling short of breath and had a cramp. "Damn, i really have let myself get out of shape," i thought to myself looking down at the round mound of fat clinging to my unfed belly.
After I caught my breath I took a mesquite log and chucked that at the dog toy - missing completely I remember thinking "Dammit - I can't hit anything" But, then the log started coming down; it landed smack dab on top of the dog tow which made a bee-line to the earth, but now there is a mesquite log, thirty feet in an oak tree over the middle of the backyard where two small children, two dogs, one cat, and one particularly out of shape woman play.
Dragging the ladder out from the garage, around the house, and then to the middle of the back yard was also a lot of hard work. I felt weak, and really just wanted to sit down, but calling the fire department to retrieve a mesquite log from an oak tree sounded idiotic.
Climbing the ladder was harder than climbing stairs. I don't spend a lot of time on ladders, and was unsure of my balance so i was leaning towards the center of the ladder, belly and breasts kept hitting the steps.
Long story short I got the log out of the tree, put the ladder back and plopped down on the bench huffing and puffing. By the time i caught my breath my belly began to grumble for food. I looked down at it, and there it was - round, and loose, and resting on my thighs. I cannot believe I let this happen.
I mean I know i stuff often, but I used to be adamant about working out, and though I know I haven't in a long time when did I get this out of shape, and this plumpened - then I remembered buying size 16 jeans the last time I went to the store.
Was I just ignoring the fact that i was getting fat? Or was i aware and just not caring?
This morning I was wearing old yoga pants from back when I actually did yoga, and that was at least 40 to 60 pounds ago, and I was wearing a cami that I had gotten about 40 to 60 pounds ago as well. When I came back inside my oldest asked me if I was gonna have another baby!
I looked at myself in the mirror, and sure enough, in that outfit, belly and love handles pinched by too small pants, and belly bare under a too small cami, the several inches of fat clung to my middle, and I would look knocked up if it weren't for how malleable and soft I was.
The lessons learned. Wiffle balls aren't good for getting dog toys out of trees, might as well just go get the ladder the first time, being lazy and having no time for exercise makes a girl severely out of shape to the point of even tossing things in the air for ten minutes gives her a cramp, and overeating makes you fat.
Will i stop stuffing? Hell no. Will i start working out? I'm going to try to find the time to do so. I might have to work my way back up to riding bikes though. the truth is I don't mind the extra flesh my stuffing has brought on - I look at it as a sign of my pleasure, but there's no reason i should be this unfit.
If you love stuffing but don't want to end up like me, don't stuff too often, and avoid sweets, and exercise a lot more often than I do. It's really not that hard to stay fit and stuff - I did for years 'til the kids came, and i had not time anymore.
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Stuffed and don't wanna be
Currently down one large veggie pizza and a six pack of Shiner 102.
I am stuffed.
The oral fixation part of this whole thing wants more, the bell craves to be fuller, but at the same time is stretched and screaming in uncomfortable bliss that it cannot take an ounce more.
Felt like I should share that.
Sometimes, you may wish for more - to stuff more, to stretch or grow more, to fit more in there, or even just to feel the texture of one more bite between your teeth, but keep in mind your personal limits, and please pace yourselves whilst stuffing so as to not cause harm.
I will let my belly settle for about a half hour to an hour, and then if I am still yearning for more then I will go for more - we shall see how it goes.
About the exercise thing, I still need to do that. I'm not going to give up stuffing though. It's not about my size more than it being about being out of shape. So will exercise and continue stuffing. Looked at some bikes today - wanted to get one but the prices were a bit high. I sold my bike when I first moved here for money, but its now time to start cycling again. I was torn between the Schwinn Sidewinder: http://www.walmart.com/ip/26-Ladies-Schwinn-Sidewinder-Bicycle/11089190?wmlspartner=YulDuSW1rYo&sourceid=38994886670855309383 for the more off-roady type areas which are accessible from here, and the Huffy Good Vibrations: http://www.kmart.com/shc/s/p_10151_10104_080V003336047000P?vName=Fitness+&sName=Bikes&cName=Bikes&srccode=cii_16776730&cpncode=22-104219214-2&i_cntr=1300597937134&sid=KDx20090423x00002 for the city streets and city parts which are also plentiful.
I can't make up my mind and/or afford either though.
I am stuffed.
The oral fixation part of this whole thing wants more, the bell craves to be fuller, but at the same time is stretched and screaming in uncomfortable bliss that it cannot take an ounce more.
Felt like I should share that.
Sometimes, you may wish for more - to stuff more, to stretch or grow more, to fit more in there, or even just to feel the texture of one more bite between your teeth, but keep in mind your personal limits, and please pace yourselves whilst stuffing so as to not cause harm.
I will let my belly settle for about a half hour to an hour, and then if I am still yearning for more then I will go for more - we shall see how it goes.
About the exercise thing, I still need to do that. I'm not going to give up stuffing though. It's not about my size more than it being about being out of shape. So will exercise and continue stuffing. Looked at some bikes today - wanted to get one but the prices were a bit high. I sold my bike when I first moved here for money, but its now time to start cycling again. I was torn between the Schwinn Sidewinder: http://www.walmart.com/ip/26-Ladies-Schwinn-Sidewinder-Bicycle/11089190?wmlspartner=YulDuSW1rYo&sourceid=38994886670855309383 for the more off-roady type areas which are accessible from here, and the Huffy Good Vibrations: http://www.kmart.com/shc/s/p_10151_10104_080V003336047000P?vName=Fitness+&sName=Bikes&cName=Bikes&srccode=cii_16776730&cpncode=22-104219214-2&i_cntr=1300597937134&sid=KDx20090423x00002 for the city streets and city parts which are also plentiful.
I can't make up my mind and/or afford either though.
Hello peoples!
I am so sorry I have not posted anything in a month and a half!!! The truth is life does tend to get a bit busy sometimes, and even I occasionally fail to provide updates to my non-essential pursuits. Yes, this blog is non-essential - unless, of course, you guys decide to start paying me for it; at that point it would become slightly more essential - and if you paid me more than I make at my current job then that would make waaaaaaaay more essential. But, that's not going to happen.
Okay, where am I in life. Same place really as I have been for a long time. Balanceing that thing called work, and those people called family. Haven't been getting out much which is frighteningly sad, and I have not been exercising at all, and by at all I mean at all. I got winded whilst walking up a flight of stairs... I need to get back in shape.
I have, of course, been stuffing like a hog nonstop - in fact, the size 14 jeans that fit last weekend would not go over my bum this morning. This I am torn on. I love stuffing, and I don't mind being this size, but I don't think I would want to be much bigger or much more out of shape - just another reason to start exercising, but how do I squeeze exercising into a schedule that has no time, and a home that has no space? Suggestions on this are welcome.
What did I stuff on last night? Leftover green beer. Yes, since Saint Paddy's Day was a Thursday we had our traditional Saint Bridget's Day celebrations. Saint Bridget's Day is a women's holiday that falls on the friday which follow's Saint Patricks Day - 'cause women are smart enough to not get plastered on a work day. Guys can celebrate it to.
Right, so about 8 green beers, 2 meals of baked ziti, 1 bag of popcorn, 1 Java Monster, and a half pack of smokes all in about 4 hours. No wonder I feel like death rolled over today, but it was fun last night.
I do need to apologize to the baby sitter though. I had only planned to be out for 2 hours, but i did pay her double.
Okay, where am I in life. Same place really as I have been for a long time. Balanceing that thing called work, and those people called family. Haven't been getting out much which is frighteningly sad, and I have not been exercising at all, and by at all I mean at all. I got winded whilst walking up a flight of stairs... I need to get back in shape.
I have, of course, been stuffing like a hog nonstop - in fact, the size 14 jeans that fit last weekend would not go over my bum this morning. This I am torn on. I love stuffing, and I don't mind being this size, but I don't think I would want to be much bigger or much more out of shape - just another reason to start exercising, but how do I squeeze exercising into a schedule that has no time, and a home that has no space? Suggestions on this are welcome.
What did I stuff on last night? Leftover green beer. Yes, since Saint Paddy's Day was a Thursday we had our traditional Saint Bridget's Day celebrations. Saint Bridget's Day is a women's holiday that falls on the friday which follow's Saint Patricks Day - 'cause women are smart enough to not get plastered on a work day. Guys can celebrate it to.
Right, so about 8 green beers, 2 meals of baked ziti, 1 bag of popcorn, 1 Java Monster, and a half pack of smokes all in about 4 hours. No wonder I feel like death rolled over today, but it was fun last night.
I do need to apologize to the baby sitter though. I had only planned to be out for 2 hours, but i did pay her double.
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